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The Crack Song

from Hellbender by Chris Shepard

/

lyrics

Started out with cough syrup, then sniffing glue
Then I saw my savior on the six o’clock News
I remember seeing him when he played for the Mets
He said these words I’ll never forget

I just flat out can’t stop smoking crack
I can’t stop smoking crack, no, no, no, no…
I just flat out can’t stop smoking crack
The shmack de shmack de shmack

I lost my teeth, I pee myself
I smack my ho right ‘cross da mout
But all in all, I’m feeling fine
They locked my ass away, they say so I won’t die
Now, how the hell am I supposed to get high?

I just flat out can’t stop smoking crack
I can’t stop smoking crack, no, no, no, no…
I even had to take my Christmas presents back
So I could buy some crack

Every time I run away from rehab
They find me and make me go back…
Let’s smoke some crack!

I just flat out can’t stop smoking crack
I can’t stop smoking crack, no, no, no, no…
I just flat out can’t stop smoking crack
I’m the Mack de shmack de shmack
And that’s a fact, Jack

I just flat out can’t stop smoking crack
I’ve got a Big Mac Crack Attack
That cracker’s whacked on shmack de shmack de shmack
I even had to give my Daytime Emmy back
Because they caught me smoking crack…

Oh, I Love That Crack!

credits

from Hellbender, released December 12, 2010

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Chris Shepard Roanoke, Virginia

"Chris Shepard ... an uncompromising original artist with a unique, darkly comic vision. He is also able to write affecting lyrics and memorable melodies in conventional song format. As a performer, he has a powerful and rhythmic guitar technique, and sings with exceptional strength and range. He deserves widespread recognition."

Randy Walker, Roanoke Times
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